Resolutions are for suckers; they’re simply a wish. Save your wishes for blowing out your birthday candles. Instead of simply making a resolution, how ’bout you resolve to doing something different and commit to an intentional process that will make you better. That’s exactly why I created the online group coaching community, Nuts and Bolts: of Self Awareness – it’s a tribe of people working to make life more than just wishes.

I am excited to have you join us, January 18th at 6:00pm MST.

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Don’t laugh, but my friends call me…. “YODA.”

Perhaps they are poking fun at my pint size stature, but they say it’s because I am wise. Of course, I can’t claim Jedi Mastery on life; but truth be told, I don’t just teach self awareness, I practice what I preach and my efforts have paid off. At this point in my life, I fully embrace my nickname – yes, I am Yoda size, as well as wise and powerful. You can be too!

Unlike Yoda, you don’t have 900 years to master happy. My new online group coaching community Nuts and Bolts: of Self Awareness is a great first step! I am excited for to join the tribe.

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The biggest cop out ever is… answering “What do you want?” with “I don’t know,” says Daune Thompson.

It’s a cop out because even if you’re afraid to acknowledge it, deep down we all know what we want; undeniably it’s there, just waiting to be affirmed. Saying “I don’t know” is an avoidance of the truth.

Pretty heady stuff, yes; but, it’s actually a lot simpler than we make it out to be.

Chances are you haven’t lived under a rock and fully subscribe to the notion that fame and fortune aren’t the golden ticket to happiness. You also know the world is full of inequalities; that there are more than just a handful of souls living in sheer poverty/unrest enduring unimaginable suffering and pain; yet, in the midst of all of that madness and the obvious paradox, a good number of those souls are able to cultivate sustainable happiness. The state of one’s core happiness is certainly a mystery; I believe Daune has identified one of the core pillars.

Just as someone living in an adverse scenario finds happiness, what is it about those select few that have honed in on their ‘life mission’ and forty years later love it with the same zeal?

You have to know at least one – perhaps it’s your friend that after decades of dedication and service to others, still wakes up every single morning with a spring in step. Armed with a to-do list of the most mundane chores like scheduling the cable repair and dropping off the dry cleaning, they’re still uber motivated and shockingly excited by the tasks that make the lives of those around them more comfortable.

Maybe it’s your molecular biologist buddy who after decades in the field, still thinks that anything dealing with RNA and protein synthesis is the greatest thing…ever. A Nobel Peace prize or anything even close isn’t in the cards; yet, unbenounced to everyone else, there is nothing he or she loves more than hours in the lab looking through a lens.

What these two people (and quite possibly the disadvantaged person as well) have in common is that they have unearthed what matters to them and here’s the golden ticket – it’s not what they ‘do’ that fulfills them for decades on end; it’s much deeper than that – it’s all about the ‘WHY.’ The dry cleaning drop off is: I joyfully give and abundantly receive. The science within a lab is: life is inherently a mystery and of beautiful design. Life within poverty is: I am grateful for all I have and retain hope.

My own quest to find my ‘WHY’ has been like a search for the holy grail; I have changed focus almost as often as I change underwear. Today, I proudly claim reformed “cop out artist” status – a direct result of Daune’s wisdom coupled with a persistence to the nitty gritty work, which starts with finding what she calls, your ‘WAW.’ In quirky Daune awesomeness, it’s an acronym for what do you Want And Why, but pronounced “WOW.”

Drum roll please…. figuring out the ‘WHY’ of what you ‘do’ is like plugging your soul into the universal grid and tapping into the truth of your existence. When you start observing life through this lens and applying it in every aspect of your life (yes, from the DMV visit to your career and everywhere in between,) life magically falls into place. Disclaimer: it’s not a bowl full of cherries kind of fall into place, life will continue to knock you around a bit – that’s life…. but you will feel centered, grounded and heck, there’s a whole lot of merit when you’re focused on what matters.

As a reformed “cop out artist,” here’s a nugget of what I’ve learned about finding your “WAW” : WHAT YOU WANT is the easy part….. perhaps it’s to have a successful family, partnership, and/or company. However, the trickier and most imperative aspect is to analyze what is most meaningful and WHY IT IS IMPORTANT. Daune says, “the reason you get out of bed every morning must be bigger than paying the bills, feeding the kids, driving to soccer practice and running reports at work.”

Once you’ve figured out your unique “WAW,” create a statement that allows you to answer the question, “WHAT AND WHY” in 4 word or less. Choose words like, joy, love, empower, inspire, etc… In Daune’s call, she shared that her “WAW” statement is 3 words, “Raise Self Worth” and I was reminded that mine is “Empower Creative, Authentic Expression.”

So… Happy hunting. Ask the questions. Dig for the ‘why’. Ask for help. Jump on Daune’s calls – don’t make the mistake and dismiss this as modern day self help snake oil; she’s the real deal, the only one that could crack my hard case. Good luck and persevere on

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Junk In Your Trunk

As we wind down into the last month of the year, we are all feeling the pressure of the holidays and busy schedules. This is a time of year many begin to reflect on their year and what they created. We tend to see many of us are overwhelmed not with only social functions but with cluttered lives. Physical and emotional clutter. I like to use this time of year to purge instead of acquire more. Sort of a pre-preparation for walking into the new year ready for action. It tends to be a challenge when you are weighed down by last year’s clutter.

How cluttered is your external world? Your external world is often a reflection of your internal world. You often see those skating by struggling to improve their lives in one or many ways will exhibit cluttered, overstimulated environments.

Think about how it feels when you’re in someone’s space that is over cluttered and messy- their house, office or car. How do you feel? You feel uncomfortable, nervous and not relaxed. On the opposite end how do you feel when you walk into a hotel room and it has minimal stimulation and zero clutter? You feel a sense of “Ahhh…,” calm and relaxed able to just be without external stimulus pressuring you to get up and work.

Your closet (getting ready), trunk (time in transit) and desk (often more than 8 hours daily) reflect how well you are coping inside with your life. For some it may be all three areas are in disarray and need a clean sweep.

A clean sweep is simple to do. Take one large bag, box or Rubbermaid tub and put all the things in it that clutter your space and purge one area at a time. Don’t overwhelm yourself by having to clean your whole life all in one session. Give yourself one place to clean at a time so it’s a simple task. If you haven’t touched in in 6 months, put it in the bag. Then let it go.

We have become a culture of have, have, have… get, get, get… more, more, more and it only makes us feel overwhelmed. We actually feel better when we have less.

Purging your external allows for the internal to begin to purge as well. It’s easier to let go of the old emotions and memories when you don’t have external stuff holding on to the energy. This lightens your load and you begin to feel less overwhelmed and lighter. Giving you a new sense of strength and a more relaxed state. Allowing you to appreciate more of your December.

Start today, clean the junk and watch your life improve. Your 2016 will thank you for it.

Brightest Blessings,
Daune

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When is your paradigm shifted? Everyone has a paradigm which is your personal set of beliefs. Similar to a blueprint that guides you to take action. What makes your blueprint right and another’s wrong? Nothing! Everyone’s beliefs are just beliefs until you choose to change them. But changing a paradigm happens only after repeating a new skill that becomes etched into the blueprint or a trauma that rips a hole in the blueprint.

I would never wish a trauma on anyone. But it seems when people are stuck on how the blueprint of their life should unfold is contradicting the beliefs of their paradigm, they get confronted with changing their beliefs. You must accommodate new thought patterns, habits and skills forced on by some traumatic event.

Often our society views pain and challenges as bad. This is only bad if you see the experience as anything other than life changing and shifting you to a greater awareness with a new belief. The pain and trauma often appears to push you off the cliff. Opening your mind to a new set of beliefs that say you can fly. You can do something the old belief restricted. You can let go of thought patterns that keep you in the blueprint of an old house that you have outgrown.

We are waking up to a new time and space where we are more aware of how we can manifest all of our dreams. But in order to do that, we must reset our unsupportive beliefs. We must be willing to repeat new behaviors, skills and thoughts that might not agree with our old paradigm. A paradigm that we were taught by someone else as true.

Repetition of new habits has to be a daily action to change an old habit that doesn’t serve you with a new habit that resets your blueprint. Its like erasing a wall on a blueprint of a house but you can see a faint line still left where the wall use to be. It will remind you at times of what your old beliefs were but only affect you if you return with a pen and redraw that line for a wall again. It’s challenging not to go back and do what you know habitually unless you are out drawing new lines and doors that design an addition onto the old blueprint to redirect your focus. The erased line will have less meaning if you aren’t focused on it. Your focus will be to make the new bolder and deeper lines of the addition into your belief set. Becoming your new paradigm.

This happens more drastically when trauma of some sort happens in your life. It forces you to build the addition fast and immediately. It puts you in a state of immediate repair and encourages the dissolve of old beliefs that no longer serve your wounded state. It often happens when you search for a more abundant life and get lazy on re-patterning. The universe in some way helps us by force. An accident, death, betrayal, injury etc. forces you to do things you were avoiding. Forces you to build a new cooler addition to your blueprint. So if it appears in your life, don’t be shocked that it appeared, it’s to make you greater.

Repetition or Trauma are how your paradigm gets shifted. It’s only up to you to determine what you want shifted and when. When challenging times arise, open your mind to the opportunity of resetting your blueprint to a new healthier blueprint that you are ready for. Look for the lesson and build a new belief and pattern to support growth. No matter if you choose to re-pattern a new one today willingly or get forced to immediately. Let it make you more powerful than you were yesterday.

Brightest Blessing,

Daune

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It seems like such a simple question, but when I ask people, “What do you want?” often the response is “I don’t know.” I think that is a cop out, we all know what we truly want. You may be afraid to say it or want it, but it’s there.

If you could have all the things you dream of, what would they be…love, security, joy, family, fun, health, connection etc.? When you ponder this question is your answer “I don’t know” or is it you’re not sure if you can really have it. So why go there right? Why disappoint yourself in wanting things that you don’t believe are possible. No need to ask yourself a question if you don’t believe in the answer.

It’s not about asking for things it’s about worthiness. It’s about digging deep into your soul and finding places you have shut down to the infinite opportunities available to you. It’s a question that makes you stretch. Stretch outside your comfort zone of what you are capable of. Wanting something you never had or only dream of requires you to take action possibly in ways that are a little scary and intimidating. This is the bigger reason why so many respond with “I don’t know.” I don’t know puts up a wall of safety and protection. But it also prevents you from achieving your dreams.

To have the love you dream of, you may have to get out of your box and go find it. You might have to start engaging in different activities that aren’t your normal social activities. You might just need to start talking about the love you are looking for so others can support the dream to come true. All seem simple but avoided. Until you realize what you truly want, you might not be open to all possibilities.

Today I would like you to entertain the idea that you can have anything you want.

Now list all of those things in no particular order or category. Then let go of the words “how” and “when”. This allows you to take all constraints and fears about them not becoming your reality. Simply stating and putting it down on paper, or list them in the notes section of your phone and let it go. Allow the law of attraction to take over. Any desire has to begin with an intention. By stating your intention of wanting to take a vacation and letting it go, you immediately remove the wall separating you from it. The wall of insecurity that says where will I get the money, time, travel partner, etc. Simply stating what you want opens you up to the infinite possibility of it appearing how and when you least expect it. Which makes it more exiting! As each desire begins to manifest, so does your belief in your worth and what you believe you are capable of.

Stop settling for love, careers, friends, experiences that don’t feed your spirit. Ask yourself today, “What do I want?” and be honest with yourself. It’s ok to want what you want especially if it’s lifting up your spirit and brings you joy. Let go… even if it takes 2 years to manifest, do not let go of your desire.

Begin your journey of infinite possibilities today and set it free. The life you dream of is waiting for you to live it.

Brightest Blessings,
Daune

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Do You Give Good Vibes?

Have you heard someone say…”I get a bad vibe from them.” It’s a feeling, vibration, resonance and it happens every day. You feel the energy around you, but many choose to use their intellect to make decisions over their intuition. Intuition is your gut, heart, feeling instinct. It’s more intelligent than your mind. It’s the strongest part of a child before they develop their intellect so they are pretty good at distinguishing between good and not so good vibes. It’s only when we grow up we are told to use our intellect over our intuition.

Hmmmm…..now whose bright idea was this? It’s time to get back to our natural instincts.

The energy you vibrate at is a good indication of what your external word will mirror. Vibration or Resonance means like energies attract. Who do you resonate with?

Just as the sound of a musical instrument in or out of tune, your life will resonate with your thoughts if they as well are in or out of tune.

One of the coolest ways to demonstrate resonance is to use two guitars. Pluck a string on one of the guitars. Now lightly touch the same string on the second guitar. It will be vibrating because it has the same frequency as the string you plucked.

Your thoughts are energy. And just like the plucked guitar string caused similar energy to start vibrating so too will your thoughts. What you think has a corresponding resonance. Your thoughts match up with similar objects and circumstances.

Be careful not to start vibrating at a poor frequency because someone near and around you is. Like the example of “birds of a feather flock together.” This is often the case when we do the work on ourselves to raise our vibration with loving thoughts and actions. We begin to feel as if we don’t fit with the old someones we used to, as they are still vibrating at the old frequency.

You are human. You have emotions. If someone is around you vibrating with a strong frequency you will too. If it is a weak frequency, dis-engage; be compassionate but not empathic to take on their poor vibrations. The fastest way to override another’s low vibration is with love. A compliment, blessing or kind gesture will keep you strong in loving vibration and intercept the flow of their low vibration of insecurity, fear, guilt or anger. It’s not for you to judge, just refrain from resonating with their frequency if it does not feed you with love and blessings.

Remember every thought you have is energy and vibrates, so make it sound like a beautiful song.

Brightest Blessings,

Daune

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Many in my tribe will tell you how spiritual I am and that my vision is through a kaleidoscope lens. Through my continuously evolving spiritual journey, I learned how to connect with my God and utilize higher power for highest good in my own way. I began to see the more authenticly I expressed myself the more connected I became. It was when I began to share my personal tools that empowered me to find deeper connection, that I realized many are confused by what being “spiritual” meant.

My faith wasn’t built while I was in the Catholic box I started in (which I am grateful for my building and understanding of God), but grew after I left the “box” as I call it. I decided to find my personal direct connection to an infinite unconditional love that was surrounding and within me at all times. While I have nothing against connection to any particular faith, I just didn’t need the middle man to connect to higher power.

I have always committed to connecting on a daily basis to unconditional love and began to realize that spiritual people often get caught up in the rules. The rules constructed by a particular doctrine, the rules that were taught by your sage or guru, or the self-inflicted rules that you pick up somewhere along your journey.

These rules determine if you are good or not. Good at being a spiritual person or not. It was shocking to me that so many who knew my true connection to higher power were surprised that I get angry and sad and even occasionally (well more than that) drop the F-Bomb. That I don’t find their poor actions or habits in any way offensive. That I can be authentic and talk about my challenging past that at times wasn’t glamourous at all. It was destructive and painful. But it’s what made me so authentic and connected.

So being “spiritual” is more like being authentic and seeing the divine plan in everything and everyone you experience. Every bully, monster, lover, hater, friend, family member and stranger that crosses your path is orchestrated to get you to grow. When they appear and push your buttons, I am first in line to support you to applaud, scream, anger, cry, swear and say f*ck as much as you need.

It occurred to me when I would meet with clients wanting to heal, it happened faster when they could be all of the above. When they could be authentically themselves. When they lost their connection to the universal higher power because they didn’t fit into the box but still had faith in higher power. Because spiritual people have painful, angry, down days. And even when you are expressing in ways that would not seem spiritual or God like, simply expressing is the highest form unconditional self-love.

This was my “aha” moment when I found others feeling like they weren’t evolving to higher levels because they were having too many crap days. No matter how spiritual you are you will still have a rough day and you will still need to purge your feelings and emotions around that day. As long as it’s expressing authentically and not projecting to another. What actions or words you use to describe it, is your own choice. However you do it is always right. So be love and be authentically you.

Brightest Blessings

Daune

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If you knew all your fears are illusions would you change? Do you remember walking into a funhouse at the fair standing in front of the warped mirrors and laughing at how funny you looked? You knew it was just an illusion but not what you really look like. The interesting thing is we look into mirrors daily that are not warped, but instead project the warped illusions in our minds of how we think we should be. We only see a warped image. You see your face, body, skin, hair, clothes, etc… as imperfect. Afraid that you aren’t good enough for others. You have a warped illusion of what you were told those things should look like by a family, media, friends or even strangers and accepted their ideas as true for you.

So this image of what you were told is etched into your mind as what you should be to be strong, healthy, beautiful and loveable. This is the biggest crock of crap and it really irritates me. I deal with this in clients on a daily basis. It truly breaks my heart to see what others are doing and saying to themselves that stops them from feeling whole and complete. Somewhere in their life they walked into someone else’s warped mirror of illusion and was told to believe it.

We have all come to a place in our lives where we are waking up and realizing its time to love ourselves from inside out and top to bottom. This realization has been slowly arising in every soul but it seems with so much devastation and destruction in the world lately, people are slowly waking up to the fact that they can take back their power and truly love themselves no matter what suffering they have endured, instead of looking for outside validation to complete them. Their happiness depends on them and no one else.

This happens by cleaning out the disillusioned images sitting in your mind of what makes you beautiful and whole. What it means to love yourself and who you are as a loving kind person. Standing in the mirror and loving what stares back at you. Deciding to wake up to what some call wrinkles, you now see as laughter lines. What some see as disfigured scars you see as battle badges. What others see as fat you see as the best carrot cake of your life.

Changing the paradigm in your mind is as simple as loving every part of you that includes the parts you think are unlovable. Loving those parts is crucial in changing the illusions that are only in your mind and not in the mirror. Love is the most healing drug on the planet so starting today….

Look in the mirror and say to yourself….I LOVE…. And go down the list of all the things you don’t feel are loveable traits. If any of those images have poor images attached to them, loving your fat, scars, lines, hair, clothes, etc… will either encourage needed change due to your love for yourself or it will become more beautiful to yourself each time you see how incredibly amazing you truly are.

Example: If your fat is affecting your health, loving it begins to dissolve all the emotions you have about it and energetically you being to see it either melt away or find it no longer has any power over your self worth allowing you to find a happy weight. Loving your worry lines begins to fade them from your sight and create laughter lines instead.

You will be surprised when you love those things within you, the love radiates out to others to do the same. Don’t be surprised when you get complimented on one of the things you started loving about yourself.

Brightest Blessings,

Daune

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When you’re being presented with a wall, don’t try to climb it. Don’t try to get around it. Choose a different direction instead. It’s appearance is encouraging you to turn your compass. It’s showing you that this direction you have been walking is the end of the road. You are not on the wrong path, you are just ready for a detour to a better path. Pressure, stress and pain arise to give you wake up calls. How you address it is up to you.

Many find endings and closure as defeat. When it’s really waking you up to a new more empowering reality. Lately many have been feeling the energy whirling around making us feel anxiety, nervous, insecure, pressure and down right off. This is the WALL of energy in your life asking you to redirect your path. Everyone is being asked to step up to their greatest gifts and start using them to make their lives better. Living in old worn out thought patterns are no longer working. So we are being given a universal push to make a change. Unfortunately it’s happening in very quick life changing experiences.

We are seeing people passing into heaven out of the blue, ending of relationships, career changes and family dynamics shifting as well. This is all part of our evolution. Accepting the pressure that’s pushing us to release old habits fast so we can embrace love.

What is love? Love is taking care of ourselves and doing what makes us truly happy. You are being pushed to end old patterns that are abusive, draining and unproductive so you can be lighter. When you have empty space, you can then choose to fill it with self-love. Self-love seems to be a challenge for many since they feel it stops you from caring for others. But really the healthier and more loving you are to yourself the more you have to give to others. Self-love is filling your tank with the things that fill your heart and soul.

Ask yourself, what do I love? And how do I engage in that? What do you need and start giving yourself? The old paradigm of thinking is reaching outside of yourself to find happiness and love from others. But it’s a backwards paradigm and counterproductive. By filling your soul you become the beacon of light to show others how to do the same. And you begin to help others by simply being an example of self-love. So the next time you hit a wall, ask yourself what would a person who loved themselves do? Bang your head against an un-moveable situation or do what makes you happy? This will allow you to shift your direction to a healthier, happier and more loving path.

Brightest Blessings,

Daune

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Self-sabotage is better referred to as a bad habit. I often get asked… “why do I keep making the same mistake over and over?” Simply because it’s a habitual subconscious habit. You aren’t even aware of it so you vibrate that energy out into the world and draw it to you. Then you try to dress it up in a different setting and think it will be different. When it’s exactly the same as your old repeated pattern.

Then you get your inner bully to tell you how bad you are and why you are no good at getting what you want. This is really just repeating old habits that likely started when you were a kid. Now the best way to look at this is to determine what experiences you are repeating that you are unhappy with. This could be repeating money challenges, unhealthy relationships, poor health habits, etc… Whatever it is, ask yourself about the last 3 times you had these experiences that you are unhappy with. What went wrong with the experience.

For example if you repeat unhealthy relationships, think of the three people you have loved. Now list in two columns:

1. Left Column: All the good things you loved about them.

2. Right Column: All the things you disliked about them.

When you look at the list, the left is all the things your conscious mind says this is what love should feel like, but on the right these are all the things your subconscious mind says you learned as a child what love feels like. We navigate life with our feelings. So you are subconsciously drawn to that energy, unknowing that you are repeatedly drawing your image of love that you learned when you were young. These qualities which are most likely not healthy such as insecurity, control, abandonment, neediness, abuse, emotional unavailability, etc… are experiences you learned as a child of what love looked like. You saw it so many times it became imprinted in your subconscious mind as the vision of love.

The great thing is simple awareness of this image and if it was unhealthy. Does it resemble the repeated behavior you are habitually making? You can now start working from the things that you know are loving on the left side of the list and make them non-negotiables–Raising your self-confidence and self-esteem so you stop self-sabotaging yourself by repeating old behaviors. It’s hard to stop what you are unaware of. Awareness allows you to catch yourself in the act faster and correct your course to what you want.

Repeating this same list in any area of your life helps you make your subconscious habits conscious. Allowing you to intervene when you are struggling to make change. This is called loving yourself and giving yourself experiences you truly desire. Ask yourself what you truly want and giving yourself permission to live the life you love and deserve. Deserve means “to serve.” What will you consciously stop and start serving yourself from now on?

Brightest Blessings

Daune Thompson

Open Mind Consulting
Coaching/Training/Consulting
www.ideserveitnow.com

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When things are falling apart, they are happening so your life can fall into place. It’s often the case when you aren’t living your purpose so the universe steps in to assist. Now the tricky part is refraining from taking it personally. It’s not to make you miserable, it’s a forced change so uncomfortable that you start making changes for improvement. People rarely change until there is enough pain that lights a fire under them.

When you live on autopilot instead of intention you get sidetracked from your purpose and joy. This happens when you are living unconsciously. Not paying attention to what is truly important to you. Not looking within and seeing the old unresolved gunk from your past that you stuffed down in a hidden compartment. Not seeing the poor patterns you are repeating that no longer support your happiness. Look at your weaknesses and ask yourself, what do I need to do to make myself stronger there.

The patterns may have served their purpose at the time, but are no longer needed. I’m not encouraging you to relive them, I’m saying look at them and decide if old behaviors or habits are desired and supporting you now. Ask yourself why are you holding on and what is it doing for you to hold onto things that don’t work for you? Does it bring you attention, nurturing or comfort? Poor habits are most often displayed only for the outcome or feeling it gives us. Even when it’s painful or disempowering. Be honest with yourself about it’s purpose. It’s like taking an experience and replaying a video tape of it in your mind and then finding similar experiences to bring you the same desired outcome. It may be to receive attention even if the outcome isn’t what you want. It may be to validate you are not worthy of more when it’s a repeat of a painful past. Then when you get the same outcome from a different environment, you get to tell others, “See… I told you it wasn’t going to work out for the better,” Keeping you in a holding pattern you dislike. Awareness of your weaknesses is the fastest way to get off the treadmill.

Are you are repeating old relationships, financial challenges, or poor health, etc…? When they begin to unravel and fall apart, let them. It’s your cue…. stop overthinking why and start making intentional decisions that support the life you do desire. They may be uncomfortable changes because you are so habitually use to doing the old that you might even fear how good it can actually be. Do it anyway to break the self-sabotaging behavior. Allow your grand intentions to unfold in front of you. Don’t go back and grab onto the old rope tying you to the past. Take one step at a time and just keep walking. Each step into the unknown will bring you the success you dream of. Not running on the old treadmill that had you stagnant and stuck. When you decide what you really want, letting go of what you don’t want becomes easy. Starting today, let all that is not supporting your dreams fall away. Don’t be upset when it does, you are telling the universe you are ready.

Write a list of your greatest dreams and intentions and stick with that path. Don’t ask how, just make your intention clear on what you truly desire. Then trust yourself to make the journey. You deserve it!

Brightest Blessings,

Daune

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When life begins to apply pressure do you sidestep it or accept its wisdom for growth. It seems many I have been working with as well as friends and family have been feeling this circling energy that is asking many of us to decide. Decide if what you’re doing is working and productive, and if not are you up for growth and redirection.

I was at an appointment recently and the technician said I’m not really feeling any of the energy sifts happening. But when I asked him if he had recently made a choice to let something from his past go, he said YES. He decided to let go of the relationship he always imagined he wanted to have with his mom and decided to be content with what it really is. He was face to face with deciding to let her live her journey and not to judge or intervene. Just let her be who she is and release his illusion of who he wanted her to be. He said he finally felt free.

That seems to be the way of life for everyone these days, whether it’s letting go of a lifestyle, career, relationship, friend or thought process. It’s as if we are waking up to the idea of actually manifesting what we do want instead of what we don’t.

Now this doesn’t come without temper tantrums. We all do it because we are used to the old way of doing things. We have become habitually trained to believe and live in a certain pattern. No one enjoys endings, closure or change. But just recently we are realizing in order to move forward, letting go of the old paradigms are not only necessary but unavoidable.

What I have found to make the process of transformation from old to new a little easier, be in gratitude. See it as ALL perfect and right. See every choice and experience you have made in the past GOOD, BAD, as UGLY as perfect for your growth up to this point in time. Every old thought and experience was perfect in prepping you to make the shift to a new and improved paradigm that supports the life you dream of. It is all a culmination of experiences and pressure to push you to a new life.

Look at any situation you are in that you are feeling as if you are almost mourning from letting it go, see it now as a gift. Restate what it did for you in loving grateful words. Reaffirm that it was what you needed until now. It was the best relationship, career, friend, parent, accident, trauma or experience you could have had. Until you figured out what you now want instead. State… “Thank You for being there when I needed you”. Then it becomes less judgmental, angry, sad, lonely, or fear based. It becomes love for yourself and your evolution to becoming more unconditionally loving.

See the shifts in your life with unconditional love and allow yourself with gentleness to be redirected to the path you have been asking for. A better path for your highest good. To just be in the thoughts of your dreams and start walking there. You’ll be grateful for the pressure that pushed you to a new scenery where you can surrender to what is infinitely possible.
Brightest Blessings,
Daune

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Why is it so hard to love ourselves unconditionally and give self-love? We use the term loosely…”I am loving them unconditionally.” But rarely do we love ourselves unconditionally.

I have heard clients tell me…”If I love them unconditionally…do I have to love the bad stuff too?” Yes, because only ego decides what’s bad, everything is right for your evolution! If you love unconditionally it should be without absolutes on your part as well. Which is a reflection of you loving your good, bad and ugly as well.

It means love them enough to let them fall down and learn the lesson they are meant to from the poor behavior. Stop enabling and dismissing poor behavior but love them by being more of the things they don’t love about themselves, instead of judging them for it. It means setting your own unconditionally loving boundaries that prevents others from taking advantage of you. If you are going to be unconditional love, it must start with you, so you understand how to give it. By being more of what you don’t want in others. You become what they want to see in themselves as their reflection back.

Loving others unconditionally requires you to let them fall down, make mistakes and get back up on their own. Not judging how they do it or when they will make it up again. Loving enough to let go. Trusting that it’s their journey not yours.

Most of all, unconditionally loving yourself. Take care of you first, so your heart is strong and healthy enough to teach it when others need it. Being the light they need instead of judging the darkness. Unconditional Love starts with you loving you without questioning if you are doing it right. It must start with you loving the parts of you that you mentally beat yourself up over daily.

Now here’s the tricky part, can you look at yourself with the purest of love? Divine, universal, God love that says everything is right and perfect. When you can see your life as an ongoing lesson to see how perfect falling, rising and being in each experience is. That’s when you begin to stop beating yourself up and loving all of you. This is always a fight with ego who has a right and wrong button, so we start beating ourselves up when ego says…”Society says that’s wrong, so you are bad and you should suffer.” I disagree!!!!

Everything is present for you to become more of what you don’t like and do like. It’s a simple choice every day to be more of what you want and acknowledge why “things you don’t want” are so perfect while they are present. Acknowledging how wonderful its presence was and what it offered you, gives it meaning and unconditional love for your growth and evolution.

Then you are filling yourself with loving energy and not draining yourself with mental suffering, insecurities and guilt. Love every decision and choice you make for its greatest truest purpose for you and it will lessen your guilt and allow you to love your decisions. Giving you power and energy to grow in every choice you make.

You get to choose what you want in that moment and say… “I choose this because it is giving me “This ???.” That is you filling it with thoughtful energy and powerful reasoning. That is thanking God, divine unconditional love for that experience and its lesson for you to grow and acknowledging your choice.

You can choose more of that thing for more growth or more of something else for different growth. Simply decide it’s always right and perfect for you at this moment. Love your choices and love them unconditionally. Then you will begin to take back your power and feel like you have more energy to create the life you desire.

Question of the day: No matter what they are… Do you love all your choices unconditionally with love?

Brightest Blessings,
Daune

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Let It Go

Have you been asking yourself lately….”Is this the best decision for me?” I feel like I’m being pulled in two directions.

Being blessed to work with many people at the same time, it gives me a bird’s eye view on what’s happening to so many of us at the same time. It seems the grand picture looks like everyone is getting bombarded lately with their past, present and future all at the same time and being asked to choose.

Well that seems easy enough, let go of the past…right? Not so easy when we are creatures of habit and we don’t like to let go. We put in hard work and dedicated hours to make ourselves unintentionally skilled masters of old poor behaviors, relationships, partnerships and lifestyles. Not all of our behaviors are poor, but it seems that’s the big topic on the chopping block these days… “So many things from my past are appearing, what should I do?”

Just Let Go. Don’t forget, but let go of your need to be attached to it emotionally, physically, spiritually, mentally. It was an experience that was necessary for your growth. Now its over. Let Go.

First ask yourself what is showing up?

Then ask yourself what lesson did it bring you?

Then ask if you have learned the lesson and can you apply it to the current situation?

I have a client who had a new relationship appear only to revel that he had not let go of his emotions he still had for his former lover (love and anger). This was apparent when he realized he wasn’t able to move forward with the new one until he cut cords and let go of all attachment to his past. What did he learn from it and how could he apply it to the new one that was in front of him.

The new one required him to step out of old behaviors that no longer supported their new connection. He needed to implement new skills he had learned but wasn’t so skilled at. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to, it was just uncomfortable because it wasn’t his typical behavior. He was stepping out of an old habit and embracing the new with an open heart. He knew expressing himself, his needs and being open to receiving was necessary and he had to start doing just that to make the new work. Again, as easy as it sounds, new habits are not easy, even good ones. We are all being given healthier experiences and it’s up to each of us to let go and embrace what is showing up. If you weren’t ready for success it wouldn’t be showing up. Let go of the past so you can see your future.

This example can be applied to any experience with family, lovers, or work. What is appearing in your life to let go of, so you can move forward?

Whatever it is, Let Go and start walking in the direction of what you do want. Our manifesting abilities are at an all-time high right now and it’s imperative that you focus only on what you want. You learned the new skills needed to succeed, it’s a matter of trusting yourself. Trusting you deserve to live the life you desire and not to be intimidated by new and possibly uncomfortable experiences. After a few tries, you will realize that the old did teach you how to be stronger and you will be grateful that you let go of past behavior no longer supporting you. Now you can embark on a new healthier journey. God, spirit, universe only brings what you are ready for and by letting go of old experiences, it’s telling the universe you’re ready to live your dreams instead.

Brightest Blessings,

Daune

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I am often asked for relationship advice and I sound like a broken record… Stop falling for the Sales Rep. is my first thought, and then I have to ask…”What are you Selling?” It’s basically a broadway show until you let down the mask and meet the person’s true character. This usually takes place after a month or more. The challenge is to remember your first impression whether positive or negative is of the Representative they chose to send. The person they want you to see… confident, strong, independent, secure, nurturing, and loveable. This happens because we want to impress with all the cool gadgets we want them to see as our greatest skills.

So you work your sale of sharing your talents and strengths, charming them enough until they are sold. Once either party feels like you have passed the initial assessment, which of course is of the representative, only then do we start to act naturally. Our true character comes out. Not all of those character traits are strong, confident, independent, secure or loving. This is the moment one or both parties sit in amazement!! Wow…. this isn’t the person I met and have been communicating with for the last month. Of course not, you met the Representative that was sent to impress you to see if you would bite.

This happens on a daily basis and isn’t going to change anytime soon. This ritual is part of the mating process. Puff up your chest and shake your beautiful feathers a bit to draw attention. Once the initial connection is over, the real person opens the door and says now lets see if you really want the stuff I have packed away that you may not find attractive.

This is why we are becoming so disappointed in relationships, because we are living in a world of instant gratification. Forgetting every time that the person you meet is not the real person but the representative, you want them NOW and instantly fall for the representative. Then… when they act poorly or say or do something you find unacceptable for you…. You say to yourself… “See I told you he/she was too good to be true.” Ready to jump ship as soon as one of you realizes you are about to be revealed and you can’t keep up your staged presentation.

Of course they are not perfect, no one is perfectly put together at all times. You need to respect their imperfections to give you a new perspective. Their vulnerabilities will appear and when they do, do you see them as flaws/non-negotiables/red flags, or are they inconsequential to you. Many wont even notice your insecurities if you respect yourself and your needs. Because they have their own and are hoping for the same respect from you.

The goal is to become more respectful of yourself so when you do meet others, you are confident in showing up honestly and authentically. A lower dose of your representative will appear. If you want someone to respect you, you will have to do the same. Especially after both representatives disappear. That’s when you learn if this is the right person for you. Not in the first month or maybe more of meeting the representative. That’s the fluff.

The best relationships are born out of trust, respect and time. Not falling in love with the rep that sells you all the bells and whistles. This is not what they really want to you to see, they want you to to see their authentic soul. When you respect that part, often they give you even more than the Representative you initially met gave you. They give you true Connection and want you to just be you, which is the ultimate goal in the end. This takes TIME… if you truly want connection, you will have to learn patience.

Try making a list of all the qualities you want in a mate. Then take your time to find out if they are what you really want so you don’t fall for the instant gratification trap, which is only an illusion of what you want. By respecting your own needs, it makes it easier to override disappointment from the Representative Syndrome.

Brightest Blessings,

Daune

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Drama Detox in Love

“I want to find a loving partnership”… are the words expressed daily from someone you talk to. You know someone single, divorced, widowed and yearning for a partner to share life with. There is every kind of dating, meeting and social group out there to help in the process, yet many seem to be miserable in or out of their partnerships. We are in a partnership crisis like we have never seen. 50% of marriages fail and an even higher percentage fail on second and third marriages. We have lost our reason and purpose for being in the partnership. We want the feeling it gives us but we neglect to look at the reason we are failing miserably to make them work. Now I can give so many angles to this post today but I will focus on the simplest reason and share more in a future post.

If you were to ask “What is love?”… you would get a multitude of answers to match every person asking it.

It’s different for everyone in how they were taught as a child. But yet, we all want it and we want our version. Why are we so intent on falling in love when it seems to be the one thing that truly blinds, debilitates and wounds us? Daily I see some wounded post on social media about love and getting hurt. Yet, we continue to walk the path seeking it around every corner and alley.

Are we poor learners? Are we completely disillusioned by it? Are we that forgetful of the pain it caused? This is the fascinating part of love. We keep trying because it’s who we are in our souls. What we are all seeking is not something you get or give, love is something you are. We are seeking the mirror of our own loving capacity. We seek to find another who can allow us to just BE. To allow the love we are capable of expressing when we are vulnerable, weak, tired, fearful and overwhelmed. That person who sees past our superhero persona into our soul. The part of us that questions our dreams and visions and still your partner believes in you when you don’t believe in yourself. Because the state of you just being is greater in their eyes than the shell you share with strangers.
This love that we are all in search of, it seems is being confused with what we are really in search of…Trust and Respect. The more trust and respect you have from another, the more you believe in yourself to accomplish all that your soul is here to be.

As time passes the more trust you have the greater and deeper the love becomes. As trust builds, the love you see in them makes their faults and weaknesses become subdued or even non-existent. Weaknesses are no longer seen as weak but real and simply character traits of their true being. They wouldn’t be the person you love if they didn’t have silly quirks that only you know. They hand you their vulnerability with complete and utter trust that you won’t judge. They are being in a whole and complete state with you and you know this is happening only because they trust you.

To attract this partner, you have to trust and respect yourself in the process. Like energy attracts -> like energy and if you lack trust in yourself you will attract the same partner with similar trust issues. When you don’t love yourself, you tend to look for another to fill that which only you can fill. Trust that you are willing to fill your soul and its needs to the fullest so you can attract someone who will do the same. It requires two people willing to communicate that this is their top priority and each will support the other in fulfilling it. That conversation is where trust starts.

Stop trying to fall in love and start looking for trust. Trust is the space that feels calm and centered. Its peaceful and has less extremes. When you trust someone, you begin to act like yourself as a whole and complete person. You are then safe to be the loving being you truly are and express it without fear but with joy.
Brightest Blessings
Daune

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